Wednesday, June 30, 2010
i love you... do you?
that doesn't mean you think you are better than someone else...
it just means that you value who you are & you send that message to the world.
-- jillian michaels
I watched "Loosing it with Jillian" today and this quote in last nights episode with the Vivio Family touched me.
receiving accolades has always been hard for me. i personally have struggled with this my entire adult life. i know that a lot of it has to do with an abusive relationship that i survived 11 years ago. I was never good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, tough enough... just never enough. It is amazing what you start to believe, feel about yourself, and start to change who you are and how deep it goes, when someone that is supposed to love you, makes you feel this way.
That relationship was a lifetime ago and i am definately no longer that person anymore, that was changed by an abusive relationship, however i continue to deal with some of the residual effects of not feeling worthy of greatness or feeling worthy of good things or praise in myself when someone extends me a compliment.
i saw in this episode, similarities between this mom and myself with my own 12 year old son. He struggles at times with his self esteem. It made me think... do i have something more to do with his esteem than i think i do? Does he do as he sees me do? My heart broke!
I love my son more than my life itself. I am vowing today!- to give myself more credit for the good things that i do. for my accomplishments-physical and spiritual. and i am determined to make sure that my kids... all four of them... know Every SINGLE day; how proud i am of them and how AMAZING i think they are! because they are!
I wonder too, am i the only one that deals with this? i have a feeling that i am not. i come in contact every single day with people that i think are amazing! i would hope that all of you know how amazing you are!
Do something good... and then be willing to give yourself credit! Be PROUD of yourself!
You inspire and touch my heart every day! Thank you!